TITLE PAGE

TABLE OF CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER 1: NIMAL TRANSPORTATION

APPENDIX I

ABOUT FISHPIG

Dear Readers,

As many of you have oft reminded us, the long-awaited Eighth Edition of FishPig's Updated, Annotated, Illustrated Guide to the Ways of Nimals (now, often referred to as "Muggles"§) was supposed to be in your hands before the end of NY2001. We, like you, are sorry for the delay.

As many of you don't know, just a few months before publication date, FishPig decided to take a trip to the Zubenelgenubi System (in Libra), having heard about some "plate balancers" (?) who, supposedly, "put on a really good show." Just before leaving, he materialized in my office and assured me that he'd "somehow" get his manuscript to us for publication.

Well, now we know how he means to do that! He has taken with him some antique Nimal technology -- something called a "300 baud modem" -- and is using it to send in his finished material. Looking in a reference work, we found that this particular device comes from the "dripping molasses" period of Nimal computer technology and that it will, therefore, be a matter of MONTHS before all of FishPig's manuscript drips through! ((As if this weren't slow enough, FishPig informs me that he "has to wait until after seven to get the good rates" -- which apparently explains his discontinuous transmission.))

Why is Pablum doing this to me? I don't know. I certainly don't deserve to be treated like this! Personally, I think he's just been spending too much time around Nimals and has started to "go native." Or, maybe he's losing his mind? -- while remaining a quite credible author, of course!

Anyway, realizing the clamor that exists to obtain this volume, Anamorphosis Press has decided to release it on the Web, as it dribbles in to us. We fervently hope that this reduces the number of angry birds arriving in our message center each day! 

Besides allowing you to read various parts of the Guide online, we've made some different sorts of arrangements by which you can obtain the complete work. Just CLICK HERE for details.

In any case, we hope your generation is as enlightened by FishPig's Guide #8 as generations of wizards before you have been!

Thank you for your patience.
Best Regards,
Loki Protempus

§ "Muggles", not used here, but only mentioned, is a word that is owned by JK Rowling, Warner Bros., and probably some Others. Neither FishPig nor Anamorphosis intend to infringe on any of their rights in this edition of the Guide.